So I've gone and made myself unemployed. Don't worry, the title of this entry isn't me being pessimistic, it's just a delightful nod to a groovy little PJ song.
So I'm starting Day 3 of being a full time freelancer, and while I'm not panicking yet because I don't have another solid gig booked as such, I am a little frustrated that I'm probably going to have to edit bullshit news to pay the bills over the next few months. Blurgh.
I know I shouldn't, and I agree with everyone when they tell me I shouldn't, but I just keep going back to high school & college and the fact that I didn't apply myself enough towards the things I want to do right now. Too much time submitting to my ADD. Too much time chasing around that fucking blonde girl (but that did pay off...and it also did not pay off 5 years later god damn it). Too much time not realizing the big picture. So now that I'm firmly residing inside the big picture, and recognize what this big picture is all about, I fucking wish I would have done more to be better at what I do now back then. Writing. Editing. Shooting. Networking. Learn web development. Learn still photography. Shoot more original videos. Fuck fuck fuck. I was a kid who didn't know shit and I got a job at a bullshit company for 2 1/2 years which hasn't qualified me for the things I want to do right now.
Okay, enough of the pity party. I'm still confident I'll find something good in the next few days. I'm going to spend the rest of today searching for more work, probably watch John August's The Nines (starring by beard boy Ryan Reynolds), write some lyrics for Redbirds songs (including If You'll Be Kind, the new/old/fucking awesome one), and tonight do some Stickboying. I've got a new angle to throw into the works with Stickboy, so that should be refreshing. Plus, its raining outside, so why not have an indoors day?
But I still need to blow off some steam right now. Okay...
Since when has it become socially acceptable to trim your fucking fingernails in public?
Seriously, everytime I ride the fucking train, there's always somebody clip-clip-clipping away at their nails. On the platform. In the car. You know the sound. It isn't a sound that muffles. And it doesn't lend itself to interpretation. You know exactly what that sound is coming from, and it's fucking gross.
Yesterday, a guy was clipping away on the platform at Buhre Ave. Over the side of the elevated platform. Which means some poor bastard probably got some trimmings in their hair. Really? Discarded fingernails have become another hazard for streewalking? Unreal.
Clip your fucking fingernails at home. Do it while you watch So You Think You Can Dance? Do it after you shave that hair off your lip. Do it while you make oatmeal, you sloppy, disgusting asshole. Just stop doing it in front of me when I'm in public. Fingernail clipping is an activity that needs to stay inside your house. If I saw a homeless person doing it, I'd let it slide. When I saw a homeless woman take a shit on the platform of the D at Fordham Road a few years ago, I let it slide. But you? You're better than that. Please be better than that.
Okay, steam blown. I feel a little better.